Seraya Love Story...It's Complicated

Its been a few weeks now and i have fallen for another girl again but this time its for real not one of those crush and byes.I have fallen for a few girls already in the past but i wasn't sure was it for real.
First it was a girl named wong xin yee yes it used to be one of my friends girlfriend at first so i did'nt dare to approach her.My friends name is Nico Law Kien Mun but not ong after i've realised that it wasnt real,my heart was playing tricks with me.
Ah! thank god though but not long after i fell for another girl 'Cheok Jia Chern' but someone told me she like me but it was long ago by another friend also 'Low Yue Chiao' but i thought it was a joke but i was young and naive then but now i was the one whom fell for her.LOL, i was so embaressed but during the time i liked her there was another with so much more guts than me also chasing after her, not long after i gave up.Haiz i am such a wimp.
Not long after i gotten over its soon after.And afterwards i thought that i'm over all this girl liking but it never ended afterwards i fell in love during my from 3 year it was with a girl name 'Tham Yeen Sin' and this time i really fell for her with her cute but funny personality,kawaii face and the way she acts it was all such an overwhelming sense of heart burn but also pure enjoyment that has never been felt before in my life.'I Love This Girl' i said to myself and this time its true love i think.But as time passed by i found out that even god forbid me to be with her but i'm leaving out the detail because it just hurts to much.
Now that i'm in a new year a new form and a new life i found another.What do i do this time.Why isist so hard.